Marriage is out of the Closet....guess what we still Love each other

Guess what guys we still love each other

I've noticed a growing trend. There are many married couples who are very happy in their marriage but afraid to let others know about it. That doesn't sound like such a big deal but in today's world when all we hear is the negative about marriage this would be a breath of fresh air. However many happy in love married couples are hiding in the closet afraid to let the world know that being in an God ordain marriage can be a wonderful relationship.  

All we seem to hear and see on the TV, news, talk shows and celebrity gossip is about who is about to or have broken up after "x-number" of years of marriage. We never hear a couple just sitting around and saying how they love their spouse. Even the average everyday husband or wife are reluctant to speak up about their love and happiness when it comes to their marriage.

Someone contacted us on facebook and stated "I love my husband". I wrote back and asked "what did he do for you to declare this statement to the world?" She just stated that he didn't do anything. She said that she wanted to stop hiding the fact that she was happy in her marriage and that they did get along. She said that they did have their share of the average marital difficult seasons but they had learned how to work things out while remaining happy and in love. That the both of them had decided that they would step out of the closet and declare their true love for one another.

I asked her if I could risk asking her husband if he really felt the same way? She did not miss a beat and before I knew it her husband had sent me an email. He just stated "RevLa I love my wife very much and I have gone on facebook and stated it to the world. I will no longer hide this wonderful gift from God. I don't care who knows this. My wife and I both would like everyone to focus on the God given beauty of the union instead of who couldn't make it and how hard it is. Or should marriage be for those of the same sex. Or should marriage be open or close to other people in the union. RevLa we are not there and we like where we are".

I would like to go on record to say that this is a young couple who have been married for 3 years. I know you are saying that they haven't put enough time into it for them to see the real reality. However they are not the only ones coming out of the closet. There are couples who are boldly declaring their love and happiness who have been together for many years now. Some of them have said to me (mostly the wives) that they really didn't want to appear as if they were flaunting their marriage therefore making other ladies who were alone uncomfortable.

I do feel for those ladies who are alone or not happy in their relationship and pray for them but there is no need for me to down play my love because someone else will be unable to accept it. As long as it is not done in a malicious way then just as I accept their situation they should except mine. We should be an example that God's institution does work and as long as we are His children and ask He will provide us with the same type of happiness as well.

So married couples its time to step out of the closet and declare your love for your spouse and your happiness in your marriage. Maybe then marriage will have a better picture in today's world.

I love my husband and I'm very happy after over 30 years of being one together in Christ. Guess what guys I'm out the closet too!!!

let us know how you feel about this

A Solution To A Sexless Marriage

Oh do we love summer!!! Yes it gets hot in July but still its summer. Its a time to get out and enjoy. Even the hot days are welcome when you think back over the long hard winter. These are the lazy hazy days of fun and relaxation. Even as you work its something about summer that puts you in a slow easy mode. With this relaxed  state of mind this month we want to tackle a matter that many couples are facing that they find difficult to talk about. From our research its becoming a mini epidemic. What could this be you say? Well what many couples are now facing is living together in a sexless marriage. This topic maybe too detailed and graphic for many of our readers so at this point if you don't think God made physical intimacy for the married couple for fun and enjoyment then you definitely need to stop reading this months loveazine. However if you find yourself in this state or want to prevent it from happening in your marriage then you need to continue with this months lesson.

Not tonight dear, I have a headache and it will last at least one year!!!

Growing up watching TV in the early 60's the sitcoms would have a couple and the man would be asking the woman for that special time and she would answer " Not tonight dear, I have a headache". At the time I didn't really see the joke and now that I'm pass my prime I still don't get it. I know that it had to do with physical intimacy between a married couple I get that much but why are they saying no? That's the part that does not compute. Really isn't that the greatest perk that a married couple has? God's blessing on sexual relationship!!! Comedians use this as something very funny and it could be if it was not true.

Don't get me wrong sexual intercourse is not the only thing that will make a marriage work. We know its more to it then that but no sex in a marriage is a quick way of breaking up the relationship for good. When couples aren't connecting physically in an intimate way then emotional as well as physical needs are not met and the marriage suffers greatly. It will not last. Don't get me wrong there maybe unique situations that will cause a couple to not be able to have a physical relationship such as illness still the couple care for one another and may show it in a physical way that is non sexual. But when there is no problem with health then a married couple should be connecting on the physical as often as possible.

According to a recent study it concluded that between 15% and 20% of married couples fall into this sexless marriage state. They considered that as an epidemic. They further stated that a sexless marriage was one in which the couple make love no more than 10 times a year. We know that sex isn't the ultimate test of a loving relationship, however physical intimacy is a vital way to stay emotionally connected with each other. It brings that therapeutic touch into the couples being when it is given often and freely.  It also has other advantages to the spouses because its fun, relaxing, a good nights sleep and can even make you loose weight by giving you some exercise. (wink, wink).

The bad thing about this entire problem is that if the couple continues to withhold sexual relations long enough, then eventually both of you will get use to the lack of it. Then you will stop trying to initiate it with each other. That will just open the door for satan to allow another to come in and before you know it cheating will completely destroy your marriage. The good news is that with a little bit of understanding and work you can rekindle the physical intimacy you both once enjoyed.

God did it!

We need to stop right here and get the real foundation about sex. Our enemy satan always want to lie and pretend that he did something. Understand that all he can do is copy, steal and destroy. Sexual relations was not created by the devil. He can not create anything. Neither is sex the original sin. That happened to be pride which he did thinking he was better than the one that created him. That's why he got kicked out...oh wait a moment getting off the subject. Physical intimacy not just "sex" is the original blessing that was created for us the married couple by God Himself!!! So how could something given to us by Him as a Gift be a sin? That's like saying God is a sinner and we know there is no sin in Him He is just pure love. Physical intimacy and not just plain old "sex" is our joining completely together and becoming one. That's why the proper term is making love or creating physical love. Its a joining of two parts of the physical person to be one in every way. Spiritually, mentally, emotionally, socially and physically.

Only the Almighty could create such a union. Ok then lets look at it another way if you can't accept the spiritual union of physical intimacy. Lets look at what God did....He saw that man needed something to complete him so the first present that He gave him was a beautiful naked woman created from man's own body. The next thing He did was told them to be fruitful and multiply how...that had to copulate and make babies. After telling the man and woman what they needed to do to become a couple or one unit he placed them in that wonderful garden with all provisions provided. God then looked at His couple and said "BEHOLD, IT IS VERY GOOD"!!! So no matter how you look at it this is a precious gift from our Heavenly Father and we should not take it lightly or throw it back in His Face as if we don't need it.

The next point might take the entire month of reading this over and over to understand but its summer a good time to get some reading done.

God created everything after his own nature.

Father God patterned all that he created after his own nature and lets face it that includes erotic pleasure and reproduction. Romans 1:20 bacsicly tells us that if we observe creation we can gain knowledge of our Creator. God created all the finite and material in the image of his non-material self. Now don't start throwing the stones until you read the explanation!!! We must study and search but as we do this we will discover the association of each thing our Abba created with some aspect of his image.

1. In the image of His Infinity He created time with its past, present, and future.

2. To reflect the very existence of Him God created matter.

3. In the image of his power He created energy.

4. He created vast space to reflect his boundlessness.

5. He created motion in the image of his activity. 

6. In the image of His Wisdom He created the mind.

7. In His Self-determination he created the will.

8. Our human body was created in the image of God's connection with physical creation.

9. In the very image of our Father God's Soul He created music.

10. He created color in the image of His Beauty.

11. In the image of God's experience of Himself He created the senses of sight, touch, smell, taste, and hearing.

12. In the image of the second person of the Godhead "THE WORD" He created speech and writing.

13. Our human spirit was created in the image of the third person of the Godhead "THE HOLY SPIRIT".

14. Sex, where spirit, soul, and body merge into oneness, was created in the image of communion within the Godhead.

15. In the image of God's creative powers He created copulation, conception, and birth.

16. Last but not least erotic pleasure was created in the image of worship.

I know I have given you a lot to think about and ponder on that's why we give you an entire month to read and meditate on these matters. However seeing it this way allows you to see all that God has done to show us Himself and we must be thankful and grateful for every little thing. I will just elaborate on #16 for a moment because this is the bottom line about having a sexless marriage. God didn't just give us physical intimacy to just reproduce. If so He could have made us like animals that come into heat at a certain time of the year. He gave it to us for us to enjoy one another in a form of worship. For those of us who have been in a true spiritual worship experience and a true erotic experience knows that one is the image and the other is the reality. The true heights of worship transcend erotic pleasure in degree, but not in kind. True worship occurs when you lose consciousness of self and focus upon the person of God with humility, wonder, admiration, devotion and most of all love. The true state of worship is the most intense period of concentration anyone can know. It is an out of body experience. True worship of God is the height of purity, wholeness, peace , joy, and love. It is a state of being from which you never want to leave. God being whom He Is created a counter-part to this image in the form of erotic pleasure. When you reach that state of orgasmic release it shoots you straight to heaven where you get to SEE THE FACE OF GOD and you don't ever want to come back. WOW REALLY WHAT A GIFT!!! If you can't accept my concept on worship and exotic pleasure please email me what you think God created in His image to reflect worship.

OK NOW I NEED TO JUST PAUSE AND CATCH MY BREATH SO I CAN FINISH THIS (HA,HA,HA,) Back to work.

How to rekindle the physical intimacy you once enjoyed.

1. Stop playing the blame game

One of the first steps to salvaging your marital sex life is to stop blaming each other for the problem. Sit down and calmly talk about the situation and be truthful. Make a vow to God as you pray together to get to the real root of the problem and to then fix it.

2. Talk it out

This one goes along with the blame game. You can not silently walk around in agony over the abstinence. Nor can you just keep hoping things will change. You both must sit down in a relaxed manner and just honestly talk about everything where the abstinence issue is concern. Do not look at it as being embarrassing because its so taboo. This is a major part of martial life and both of you should be able to have an no holds bar discussion about what's not right with your current physical intimacy problem.

3. If all else fails enlist a Pro for help

Sometimes no matter how hard you try things just can't be resolved by you. That's when you may need a trusted marriage mentor or pastor. You may even have to seek Christian counseling.  A marriage pro may help you to articulate the matter to each other better and can keep it confidential. He/she may be able to give you a fresh perspective and provide you with some new solutions.

4. Now take action

After all of the talking is done then stop analyzing the emotional issues and move to resolution. You must now resolve the problem using the physical. Ok spelled out ITS TIME FOR THE BEDROOM ACTION!! Don't wait until you feel in the mood those days are over for now. As always my suggestion is to make a weekly date night and always follow the date with the physical action. This is a must at least each week and more if the need be but never skip date night no matter what. Even before the date night everyday take 10 min. of your time where the two of you come together and just hug, kiss, hold hands or just touch one another as you tell each other how thankful you are that God blessed you with your spouse. Just 10 min a day mandatory as well as once a week date night followed by a night of passionate love making.

Well I do understand that this loveazine topic has been long but I pray its helpful. To those that find there marriage in this situation and to those who don't ever want their marriage to come to this knowledge is the power. With God all things are possible and He has placed the information for us to have. The world want to convience you that marriage is obsolete and if you can't get along to just divorce. That's not God's plan for marriage and since He created it then He's the source to solving any problems we may encounter. As always 2-R-1-N CHRIST is here for you and offer all that we have and all that we have learned to help you have a Godly marriage and relationship.

  2-R-1-N CHRIST

         Marriage and Relationship Ministry

Sometimes inorder to be a great couple you have to be great apart!

You must love yourself first before you can couple with another

Writing this post today seems strange because our emphasis here at 2R1N CHRIST is to promote marriage and relationship. So how can I say that being a great couple would have you at a place of being apart? Our bottom line goal is to establish all married couples to be individuals together becoming one in Christ Jesus. However in order to do that there are times when you just need to be a lone individual before you can really enjoy being part of a couple.

If you have been a part of this marriage ministry you understand that this is wedding season. Many couples are planning and taking that next step. We are elated and have been extremely busy. Not only that we have started our summer season of lectures and are speakers at many local and some out of town marriage ministries as well. We have started the next phase of our ministry which is to establish a social network that places God in the social mix and that is in its infancy stages so its taking a lot of work.

Let me stop here and have a quick sidebar: I must invite you all to become a disciple of the new social network FEELING GOD. Its two weeks old today and a great place to gather and fellowship. http://www.feelinggod.ning.com  sorry end of sidebar back to the blog post.

So to say we have been very busy and in that the regular everyday life of working and living we don't know if we are coming or going half the time. So a strange think happened last Thursday. We found out that a church who had booked us for their spring marriage ministry conference canceled. My long weekend of running around and being busy with the conference etc. was now gone. Driving home from work I had been noticing that I just didn't feel like myself in my physical. I needed something but just didn't know what it was. Thinking that maybe I needed to change my diet (which I do) I decided to stop pass this natural health store and buy some vitamins.

To my surprise once there the store turned out to have a wonderful day spa in the back. I had just missed the May specials (gee whiz) but their prices were reasonable. I set everything up for Sat. since I was free and then wondered what was I going to do with my husband.

I got home and my husband was sitting on the bed making fishing lures. He greeted me with the sunniest smile and then said " So we are free this weekend?" I answered him in the affirmative and he shouted..."great I'm going fishing Friday night and won't be back until the end of the day Sat."!. Then he looked at me and asked as an after thought if I wanted to go. I said no go have fun I have something planned.

Long story short the weekend came. He was away having a ball with one of our sons fishing and fellowshipping. And I was in heaven. I had the best "ME" day ever. I had the works and by the time I left I was walking on air and all was right with the world. I made it home had a light meal and picked up my computer to work only to listen to the Holy Spirit and put it back down. I relaxed and listened to music and just thanked God for the joy of having a day that was just about me.

My husband arrived home excited and beat but so happy. We looked at each other and knew that this day apart was so needed. We talked about each other's day and decided that we must do this more often. We ended up the evening in each other's arms more appreciative of the fact that we were together but enjoying that we could be apart and have time that was only for oneself.

Moral of the weekend. You must have a "ME" day every now and then in order to enjoy the daily couple life. Decide what you want to do and then just do it. When you come back together you have a mini date night where you talk about your wonderful time of enjoying yourself and friends if you are like my husband.

Second moral of the weekend....I've already schedule a repeat of my day in two weeks and have encouraged him to do the same.....ha,ha,ha....

OH THOSE "ME" DAYS GOT TO LOVE THEM!!!

HAPPY WIFE DAY

Love and Respect = "Happy Wife Day"

It was a hard day at work and I was behind with all of my end of the year reports. I wanted to be done with everything as I do most years. This should have been the time of the year that I would be at ease and just doing little things to end the school year. However this had been a very difficult year and everything was behind. Thus I was trying to complete a report that was due on the 30th of April and let's face it I was already behind and still was not nearly finished.

So as I was working at full speed and getting no where my cell phone rang with my husband's special ring. I started not to answer him and would just text him letting him know that I was busy and that I would call him back when I had time but I picked up and said "hello Honey...what's up?" He simply said "Nothing's up." He then said "HAPPY WIFE'S DAY!!!" I was silent for a moment because I just couldn't understand what he was saying. This happened to be the 6th day of May. Mother's Day was coming that Sunday on the 8th of May so I thought that he was trying to say happy Mothers day but it just seemed weird. I said "ok Honey but mother's day is Sunday." He then said "This has nothing to do with mother's day I have just created a new holiday that we will celebrate every year on the 6th day of May. Its called "Happy Wife's Day" and when you come home from getting your hair done I want you to dress up because I have a surprise for you and we are going out for my new holiday. I love you and I want you to know it!!! He then said I love you in German and we hung up.

I didn't know what to think but I smiled for the rest of the day. It was nurse's day and my boss celebrated by surprising me with lunch. We had a wedding to go to on Saturday from a couple who had been a part of 2R1N CHRIST and we had Mother's Day on Sunday. I was suddenly like a kid in a toy store. I worked on my report with a different attitude I didn't finish but I was no longer stressed about being behind. I got off and went to get my hair done. My locktian and I talked and she spoke about loving the ministry and the monthly loveazine that she received via email each month. She was excited about "Happy Wife's Day" and wanted me to let her know how it turned out.

Loving my hair and excited about the night to come I rushed home and got ready. Earlier that week I had seen a pair of diamond earrings that matched the antique ring that he gave me for my Christmas present. I was thinking that I would buy those earrings for myself this summer for my birthday. I was telling him that I was going to do and was just talking when he went to his office and called me in. I was not paying any attention and was just talking about really nothing as wives sometime do. Suddenly he said "HAPPY WIFE DAY" and presented me with a little black box with the very earrings in them. I screamed and cried and kissed him all over.

We went out to dinner at one of the college's date night hot spots and saw all of the young couples as they looked at this vintage couple who were very much in love. To say the least the night ended in wedded bliss (if you get my meaning) and we rejoiced in the love that God had created just for us.

The next day we went to the sweetest wedding ever and people stopped to say how lovely we looked. As I watched this couple beginning their wedded life all I could think of was that I prayed one day he would present her with her own holiday of love. We danced and rejoiced and gave out our cards because many people had heard about us from the couple. Then we went home changed and went to our daughters to babysit so she and her husband could go out for their first anniversary. We enjoyed being with our grandbaby and she had a good time. Our daughter and son-inlaw came home late and the baby had just woke up as if she was missing them. They were so happy to see her and we could see how loving this couple was. We went home rested then woke up for church and a loving Mother's day.

I so enjoyed having my husband create a holiday just for us. Which was all about me. It showed that he still cherished me enough to show his love. It is so true a man shows love when a woman shows respect...but then that's a topic for another post.

The last thing I said before we went to bed ending that wonderful weekend was this...."Honey I guess now I have to create a husband's day right?" Then he said

"NO ANY TIME THE WIFE IS HAPPY THEN THAT'S THE BEST HUSBAND'S DAY YOU COULD EVER HAVE"

Man got to love him.....and I think I might keep him after all

PS: My husband is currently in hot water from all of his friends who's wives were told by me about "happy wife day"...and are now looking for them to give them one...ha,ha,ha,

                                                                Happy Wife Day

What The World Needs Now Is Love Sweet Love

A great song writer Burt Bacharach

wrote a song called "what the world needs now is love....sweet love. It's the only thing that there is just too little of . I use to love that song. I was very young when the song came out but I really loved the words. I could tell that it had been inspired by God even at my young age. As we face all the worlds tragedies that have taken place lately I have seemed to be drawn back to the words of Mr. Bacharach's song.

I have never seen the world so hopeless and in despair. We have lost our love for true moral values and have replaced them with anything goes. We see it now with the breakdown of the family because marriage as created by God has been put to the back burner and looked at as if it's standards are old and obsolete.

Our children are growing up with the thoughts that everything that was once considered bad is good and what was considered good is now bad.

Its not good to be in a committed relationship where the spouse show love and respect for one another. Where the couple places God as the Head of their union and vow to spend their lives together for life no matter what comes their way.

Where the couple make time everyday to learn and study how to grow their marriage. How to discover ways to work out the kinks of just living together and growing in perfect harmony. Where they realize that living in today's world is rough but that living during rough and difficult times does not mean that you bring those horrible times into your marital world.

Where the couple work hard to protect their union and perserve these values so they may be passed down to their children and future generations to come.

As we turn on the TV each day and watch all of the many disasters going on in the world it can bring anybody down. The world's poor economy. Good people attempting to work and keep a roof over their heads but unable to find jobs or being laid off after many years of devoted dedicated service. People loosing their homes, life savings, retirement benefits while big business spends our money go bottom up and then get bailed out only to spend the bail out money on themselves.

To wonder why hard working law abiding citizens are being jerked around while Congress votes to reduce or hold up all things that we need to make it and then makes sure that they are given raises. While many of us are faced with rifs, mandatory furloughs, higher gas prices, and higher taxes.

Our leaders are too busy fighting about things that don't really matter while they blame each other for causing the world to be bankrupt and the working man/woman must bail them out.

Nature too has turned her back on us according to the news because all we see is tornadoes, hurricanes, tsunamis, earthquakes, and drought all over the world.

We hear of wars and rumors of war. People are fighting over nothing for the most part. We push out God and His Standards so therefore we become numb to all of this as we as humans begin to decline.

We are depressed, addicted to everything including food and love means absolutely nothing.

Burt said it right when he said:

"Lord we don't need another mountain there are mountains and hillsides enough to climb. There are oceans and rivers enough to cross, enough to last till the end of time.

I think now that we need to get back to a real love. Love for God, man and our country.

Love for each other committed to the end of each others life.

A love for good morals, honest living and all things that are good and just.

A love for hard work and a love for all people no matter what color they are, what religion they share, how rich or poor they are, how much education they  have.

A TRUE LOVE LIKE GOD HAS SHOWN MAN!!!

Many of us has cried out to God to show the world just a little love at this time. To give us something that would make us stop and look at true love for just a moment. We needed a world stopping love that would make us stop what we were doing for just a second and take note of something other than death, destruction, sex, addiction, natural disasters, and war.

We needed to wake up to "LOVE"

We needed to see a couple that loved each other enough to let the world know it and bring back love and fantasy even if it was just for one moment in time.

We sang out loud and clear to God the words to Mr. Bacharach's song

"SO HELP US LORD IF YOU REALLY WANT TO KNOW

WHAT THE WORLD NEEDS NOW IS LOVE SWEET LOVE

IT'S THE ONLY THING THAT THERE'S JUST TOO LITTLE OF

WHAT THE WORLD NEEDS NOW IS LOVE SWEET LOVE

NO NOT JUST FOR SOME BUT FOR EVERYONE"

and guess what guys???

GOD HEARD US

and just for one day we woke up to LOVE

HE GAVE THE WORLD

WILLIAM AND KATE



(Picture provided via Yahoo.com)



Thank You LORD

it was good waking up to Love!!!

Cupcakes, Soda Pop, and Fishing....Oh My!!!



Cupcakes+ Soda Pop+ Fishing = Love



Its so much fun when married couples go away for a relaxing weekend of loving and reconnecting. The best part of it is when you start and end with a theme. During our Valentines mountain retreat of "rest, relaxation and romance we decided that we would repeat our grouping in April. Instead of going back to the mountains we wanted to go to the beach. The only problem was that the weather would not be warm but we would have the entire area basically to ourselves. We knew that the boys could not handle another weekend as we had before. They enjoyed it but made it clear that they wanted to be out and about. What they wanted just as much as us was a group Fishing adventure.

So we created a new theme. One that would embrace the ladies and cheer on the men and still end with romance. I have been working with a talented young lady who would be creating exclusive products for our webstores. I told her that I wanted a great weekend that would set the couples on fire. At the same time I wanted something sweet. We put our heads together and then came up with a perfect theme. Cupcakes, soda pop and fishing.

We had milkshake soda pops made in lovely scented candles....cupcake bath fizzies in enticing flavors that if you didn't know better you would want to eat them. We decorated the tables and areas with cupcake scenes. We had the candles and bath salts with small gift baskets of scented lotions and body sprays. I found matching lingerie that would make the men blush as it allowed the ladies to feel at the height of their sexiness. All the ladies had them in pretty pink bags with cupcake decorations on them.

We burned melon scented candles and had plates of real cupcakes in all flavors and soda pop. We produced a wonderful dinner and turned on piano love songs. Around the table was an assortment of fishing rods and fishing gear. We then called the men to come to the table. We had the doors opened and you could see the bay and see the waves and the smell of the salt bay air blended well with the melon scented candles. We had the guys full attention when they came in and saw their gear all around and a cupcake party for the girls.

That's how the weekend started and we had a ball. The men were so excited about going out fishing the next day that they came back with gifts for us. We each were given the cutest fishing rods in pink, orange and yellow. They lite up when you started to reel in the fish. They brought us hats  with matching tee shirts and sweatshirts. They were like little boys excited to be with each other and their girls.

Likewise the ladies got a kick out of playing with their cupcake theme as they opened their sexy gifts and we laughed at how and when we would wear them. We ate cupcakes and drank soda pop as our guys fished off the pier right outside of our patio. They became slightly upset when we turned down the music because they were enjoying it as well. So we kept the music going and the cupcake party going and just had a wonderful time.

Later that night we played music couple charades and just laughed and laughed. No one noticed that one by one the men excused themselves to go to the rooms. The ladies were having so much fun that we didn't pay it any attention. Soon it was time for the couples to retire and we notice that the men wanted the love songs to continue to play. When each couple went to their room they found that the doors were closed. The men opened the door for each lady and once the door was opened we could not believe our eyes. Each husband had gone to their room and set up the most romantic scene ever. There were candles burning all over the room. Sweet incense and plates of cheese crackers and fruit. Sparkling cider in grape and apple chilled.

The piano music playing in the background as the full moon lit the night sky and the waves hitting the surf from the bay. Suddenly all you heard in the entire suite was the sound of the ladies screaming with joy and surprise. Then it was our turn as we made all of the men go back to the common living area as we prepared. Each lady put on their matching tangerine nighties and called in  their husbands.

This time all you heard was the men making noise!!! Music played all night and we rejoiced in each other as we fellowshipped in the way that God created just for the married couple. The next morning the guys got up and made breakfast and then ran out to the fishing area with smiles on their faces. The ladies went to the boardwalk and road a group bike, took old times pictures for our great men ( all saloon girls with attitudes....ha,ha,ha,)we had a ball dressing up and laying on the bar. We shopped and had lemonade, cotton candy, frenchfries, and corn dogs.

The guys loved their sexy saloon girl pictures and we had more fishing gear waiting for us. We had a wonderful time. So moral of the story...if you want your guys to romance you then include something that they really like to do. Put that together with something that we really like to do then gather up some great married friends and plan a weekend to remember.

If you can't think of a theme then try ours there is nothing like:

CUPCAKES, SODA POP, AND FISHING....Oh My!!!

When the music stopped so did the Love!!!

Where is the Love?

I am a child of the early 50's. Growing up there was one thing that was very consistent and that was music. It was all around us. We as children and through out our teens even into our early adulthood there was music. We learned to appreciate all types of music. Gospel, jazz, rock and roll, country, classical, hard rock , and contemporary. It didn't matter. What mattered was that this music had words that inspired and seemed to generate love.

Whether it was love acquired, love desired, love lasting, love wanting, or love that had been lost but wanting to be regained...the point was it centered on love. This music seemed to keep couples united. Caring and sharing how they felt. Many men didn't know just what to say to a lady but they could hear words to a song and get a line or two that would win the heart of their lady love.

Men would listen to the words of a song by Smokey Robinson and he would say " I will build you a castle with the tower so high it reaches the moon. I'll take a melody from birds that fly and compose you a tune. Everyday we will play on the milkyway and if that won't do then I'll try something new". Knowing that your man could not do any of these things didn't matter but just the thought that he would try something each day to win and keep you would just lighten your heart and keep you loving him.

The words to the songs were always up lifting and presented women and love in a respectful way. Classics such as Elvis Presley's Can't help falling in love with you when he sings "wise men say only fools rush in but I can't help falling in love with you. Take my hand and take my life too but I can't help falling in love with you". These songs in my opinion kept love alive and marriage strong. It focused on love and togetherness. If you were having a difficult season you could put on the music and it would soften your heart.

Even when the marriage was in trouble you could hear songs like the Chilites when they sang "oh girl I'll be in trouble if you left me now. Cause I don't know where to look for love and I just don't know how." Or Johnny Mathis as he sang "chances are you believe the stars that fill the sky are in my eyes." Or the Temptations when they sang "the girls alright with me you know the girls alright".Or even the rock bands like the Rolling Stones when Mic Jagger sang " I can't get no satisfaction..and I tried and I tried and I tried." You have the gospel with "Falling in love with Jesus is the best thing I've ever done."

So when did we loose the love? When did couples stop looking dreamy in each other's eyes? When did marriage and relationship take on such a negative connotation? Personally I think when the music stopped. When the love songs were replaced with pounding demonic sounding beats from hard rock. Or negative adjectives about ladies and their anatomies by rap groups. When women's-lib decided that it was too demeaning to receive love in this way and more and more songs about "I am woman here me roar."

I have no problem with women being treated as equals where work is concerned but I do have problems when society tends to forget to give us our respect. When the world mistreats us just because they feel that we are the weaker sex. We are still the hand that rocks the cradle. We are still the ones that set the love tone. We are still the ones whom God created to be a help to man. So we deserve to be loved and cared for in all ways.

I'm not saying that music or lack of it is the entire reason that our society is crumbling and marriage is in jeopardy. What I'm saying is that music, art, poetry and books all have an impact on how we live. When kids constantly hear that woman are whores, that lets sacrifice our lives to the enemy, and money is king and the most important thing that we have then they look at our old values as just that old. When couples constantly hear that marriage is nothing but a piece of paper and that it should not be exclusive. That being with one person is old and out dated creates the image that marriage really is not worth all of the effort.

What the love songs did was keep the love in the air. It kept the melody alive in your heart. Think about it...how many times have you heard one of those great songs and it stayed in your head all day. You walked around humming it or singing the chorus or just a word or two. Each time you sang it you began to smile.

We have to bring the love back. We have to put goodness back in our spirits. We have to place focus back on the things that will keep us together in harmony. I really feel that we must start with the music. Why? Music is a universal language in itself. It reaches all. Just singing a love song that supports women and men in relationship helps strengthen the union. Something that allows lovers to dream again. Something that will make the young take notice and see that its easier to win the heart with love then with demeaning words and gestures. It allows the strong woman to understand that its alright to be strong and its just as good to be loving and lovable.

My theory is that when the love songs stopped the words and music changed then slowly without notice love just left. Replaced with all sorts of dysfunction and malice. It is said that music is the soul of God that's why we react the way we do. Likewise man has allowed what was put here for our good to be destroyed and manipulated to a point that we no longer respect each other or what is good and wholesome.

I would like each one of you reading this blog to go home and put on a oldie but goodie love song. Take your spouse in your arms or by the hand and just slow dance. Listen to the words and feel the music go with it. I can guarantee that before the night is over you will be so deep in physical intimacy that you will wonder where that burst came from (wink wink). Then when you recouperate from this experiment drop us a comment and let me know if my theory was right or wrong.

Finally I leave you with these words:"Finally, brethren whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report: if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things. Philippians 4:8. What Paul is telling us is to find whats good in this world and put our focus on that to get us through. Marriage as God created it is under attack. I feel that by loosing the music the love songs that our focus has moved away from love. Only we can bring it back.

One of our favorites is by Frankie Beverly and Mazie...I've quoted from this song so many times but I just love it..."everyone must make their own kind of love in their own kind of way...your own kind of love is what you feel..."

Now with that said I'm going to go and find my spouse and put that song on and well..........